Friday, July 4, 2008

Eternal Dreamer

Basically I am the sort of person who works in artistic fervours , it means I work in short time intervals , but I am deeply involved in my work , and I don’t eat , I don’t sleep , I don’t even pee .. when I am really doing something.
When u look up to someone as “ the guy” in some field … in your own eyes , then a few words of encouragement from the same can do wonders. For example , if your maths sir whom u adore , tells u , “ kid u can do something in maths” , then at least I guarantee that u will go back that day and study maths all evening.
So when the poet guy Charbak comes along and tells me that my puny poem is “quite good” … I enter into another of my artistic fervours and write a poem, again.
This one is all about dreams , and their eventualities

I stood on the pavement, and stared at the palace
Nothing but a tattered overcoat. Patched with rags
On my shoulders remained. I had tried hard
And I had failed , losing everything in the process
My belly feels numb: my voice ,stuck with gags
My head is reeling, my mind is racing, I feel nothing
I pass out ……………..

I am back again , in my shanty outside the city
I see my amateur acting laurels on my cot
I can see myself taking my parents blessings
I am going out on a journey , rather a mission
I am resigned to hard and tenacious work, at all times
I am ready to do anything it takes
I will enter the palace , and I will become king!

I see myself journey to the city , alone
I reach it in the dead of the night. Its dark but
I am motivated far more than to fear a lone road
I look for a place to place my head. Tomorrow
I will go to the palace , tomorrow I will start it all
I wake early next day , to find myself robbed . but
I don’t worry. They haven’t taken me , I say.

I stand in front of the palace and look up
I marvel at its high arch, just like in the pictures!
I say to myself while I smile and wonder .
I am a petty sight . red brocade overcoat and no money
I don’t think , I just enter the gates .once inside
I take a good look at my paradise , my dream
I am finally here , no turning back … I think .

My name ? Gary Myers . u want to know ?
My dream ? to be a movie star a starlet
My palace ? the world’s biggest movie studio
My dad ? peasant and trader. All this is
My lunacy ? no its not. At least for me .
My current job? None , except dreaming about
My next job ..that of a star ! a reel deal !

When I am standing at the door and thinking
All this , I don’t see that some people are staring
I remember now to start showing my laurels
Carefully collected and sorted , but they are gone !
Exasperated , I curse the evil soul who has done this
But here come the security of the palace
They are big, burly and have an unforgiving look

I try to run . you are not taking this away too
This is mine. It always was. But they hunt me down
They pick me up , and throw me out …nay toss me out
I fall on the pavement , my nose bleeds
And a pair of teeth get spilled on the sidewalk
I get up . my pride wounded and dreams shattered.
Wait ! I don’t remember getting kicked ……

The fellow is still alive ! heat exhaustion !
I catch snippets of conversations. I open my eyes
And the kicking stops. Are u alright ? someone asks me
I grin … a semi toothed grin… yes sir ! I am
I am helped onto my feet . I see a crowd of people staring
Some are taking photos … I realize that I have done it !
I am a star ! my dream is realized ! I am beyond happiness.

( next day )

I stood on the pavement , and stared at the palace
Nothing but a tattered overcoat . patched with rags
On my shoulders remained. I had tried hard
And I had failed , losing everything in the process
My belly feels numb: my voice ,stuck with gags
My head is reeling , my mind is racing , I feel nothing
I pass out …………….. Again !

acidVox 5/07/08


suchetana said...

gr8 Yaar.....bitter reality of lyf..& dreams dat can nvr be fullfilled....itzzz true...thugh we don't stop dreaming..coz the hope among us is our lyfline...

rimz said...

Really donno wat to comment...
its beyond words..the bitter reality~ really i cnt take it..:( :(

acidVox said...

to piu : hope is the four letter word which has kept the entire human community striving to goahead and survive ! hope is important.

to mamon : i hope i dont make u sad through my poem ! but its the realty : and it is bitter as it is most of the times